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TMT: The Hammer And The Holocaust

Issue #127, The Mighty Thor (Apr. 1966)

The Mighty Thor “The Hammer And The Holocaust!”

Melodrama: a play, film, etc, characterized by extravagant action and emotion.  See also: The Mighty Thor.

If you thought Thor was dramatic before, I only have one thing to tell you: it gets worse.  By worse, I mean in a totally awesome melodramatic way because you KNOW it just has to go down like that.  The emo is so thick in this issue that I might just have to take a trip to Hot Topic just to gear up appropriately.

There is no summary this time from the mighty minds behind this marvel.  Even they were surprised at just how this story arc has turned out.  So it’s up to me to recap: Thor and Hercules duked it out over Jane, which then turned into a godling pissing match over who was more awesome. Meanwhile, back in Asgard, Odin kept watch, reserving his final judgment for the WORST possible time, and even then, chickening out and giving his power to Seidring to do his dirty work for him.  Said dirty work being the halving of Thor’s powers, again, right at the most inopportune moment, causing him to lose his fight against Herc. Woe!  A broken, bitter shell of a man, reduced to ridicule and disfavor, our hero limped off into the sunset to write bad poetry in his emo diary, while Jane lamented, until Odin piped up and told her to go after Thor. What a twist!

ONWARD!

We are IMMEDIATELY plunged into the icy waters of emo when Harlot!Jane catches up to Emo!Thor:

*sniffle tear* So very, very alone. Woe unto him. WOE!

Harlot!Jane tries to convince him that it was all a big misunderstanding, that he’s still her love, that she will never forsake him:

Oooh. Nicely done there, Jane. That's something to tell the kids later: When I saw your daddy all beat up and defeated by Herc, that's when I knew I loved him. So...yeah. Also? Emo!Thor rejects your pity. Verily.

Tired of her pestering (a little too late, might I add, Jane) our hero tries to flee, attempting to get away and lick his wounds somewhere that no one can find him:

And in true Clingy!Jane fashion, it becomes all. about. her. Way to stay classy, Jane.

Cue epic E!T flounce in 3….2…

Roger that. We are go for epic!flounce, ground control.

Clingy!Jane’s pleading is interrupted by a completely random accident caused by a man “darting” into “traffic” and just getting “mowed down” by a car.  Instantly seeing that someone else of the male species needs her, she runs over to assist:

Clear a path, folks! If there's one thing Jane's good at, it's nursing injured men back to health.

Meanwhile, we focus on a set in Hollywood in Stardust Studios, where preparations are being made to accommodate the arrival of their newest star: Hercules.  There are swoops and swirls of color everywhere, and one of the workers remarks that the director must “think he’s some kinda god or something” with the outlandishness of the decor.  As the disparaging remarks continue back and forth, they get a sudden visit:

Surprise! Betcha never envisioned the Roman god of the Underworld to look quite like this, now did ya? Oooh. Look who's rockin' the white suit, red cravat style!

It would appear that Prissy!Pluto has some “changes” in mind to overthrow the status quo:

Herc is totally going to take the Netherworld ruler office and make it groovy. Just you wait. That's exactly what the Netherworld needs...a hot, beefy injection of masculinity.

Meanwhile, Emo!Thor, stifled all to hell by the city, decides he needs to go somewhere more open to think about what he’s going to do with this halved power of his.  Does he use what remaining power he has for good? Or does he ditch the Thunder God routine entirely?

Think...think think... Pooh Bear's got nothing on Emo!Thor when he really gets his sulk on.

Back in Asgard, Daddy!Odin is wracked with regret, questioning why he had to be so mean.  In the background, as initially predicted, Super!Seidring stares at his hand…

Woe unto Odin. I suppose this is what's meant by "this will hurt me more than it'll hurt you", eh? Way to rock the parental guilt, there, Odin.

Cue the internal evil monologue (because NO ONE TOTALLY SAW THIS COMING A MILE AWAY):

This hand... is an awesome hand!

It’s obvious to everyone but Odin that the Allfather has completely forgotten about giving his Odin Power to Seidring, so when he orders him to help, Odin gets a less than favorable response:

Seidring and his Awesome!Hand say thee NAY!

Outraged!Odin tells Seidring to do his worst, so he does, blasting Odin with a bolt of his newly acquired awesomeness. Outraged!Odin finds himself somewhat surprised that it hits him as hard as it does:

Thus does the great Odin learn the meaning of "irony".

Balder, having heard the blast, rushes in, armed to the teeth, prepared to fight for his liege, only to be stopped by Awesome!Seidring.

Oh. Well alright then. With a face like that, who could resist?

And what of Emo!Thor, you may be asking? Well, let’s check in and see:

Looks like status quo is being maintained. Broody walk? Check. Vi-woe-lins playing in the background? Check.

Our hero stumbles across Good ol’ Heimdall, guardian of the bridge, and is shocked to discover him encased in a block of “ethereal force”. Heimdall warns him away and, as expected, Thor decides to completely disregard his warning, whooshing past and heading straight for Odin’s throne room. Along the way, he realizes that something must be seriously wrong because everyone seems bound by the same ethereal force as Heimdall:

When Asgardian Burlesque goes bad. Beware the yellow boa of DOOM! See what happens when you run off to earth, Thor?

Making it into the heart of the city, he finds Balder frozen in place on his horse, and starts to woe out loud about what could’ve happened to Daddy!Odin, when suddenly he’s surrounded by a ring of fire.  Seidring tells him all about how Odin’s lost the universe, and how he was the one who stripped Thor of his power. Naturally, he propositions the Thunder God:

I've heard of on-the-spot interviews, but this is a tad ridiculous. Also? Surprise! Fake Flames!

Back in Hollywood, because, y’know, we’re ALL dying to find out what Pluto is doing, it would appear that the god of the Netherworld is entertaining guests:

Sassy! I like her already. Although, I must admit, of all the things I'd pictured an Amazon Queen wearing...that blue getup certainly isn't one of them.

She’s been called in to make Hercules fall in love with her, but she’s only one piece of the plan.  The other piece?

Er, okay then. Are we sure that he can actually sign his name? Bah. Details!

But enough about them, let’s go back to Asgard, because it’s MUCH more fascinating to watch Emo!Thor square off against Super!Seidring:

Okay, so I'm noticing a pattern here. Everyone seems intent on making Thor cry uncle. I guess it's not enough to just, I dunno, destroy him outright.

Seidring decides that the best way to accomplish his goal? Throw some planets at Thor.

Surprise! Planetary attack.

And, as expected, our hero is a few steps ahead, swerving out of the way to let the planetoids crash into each other without harming him.  Oh, but Seidring’s just getting started:

Can't you just FEEL the joy radiating off this guy? Remember, kids, being evil is FUN!

Thor finds himself being sucked into a “globular substance” that turns out to be liquified wolfsbane.  An interesting choice, to be sure, and one that Seidring is most proud of:

I don't think Emo!Thor was ready for that jelly. Also? Thor STILL says him nay.

All that struggling within the globule pays off, as the thing pops and spills Trapped!Thor onto the floor, much to the irritation of Seidring:

Even drippings with goo, Thor says thee NAY, evil one! Although, I have to admit, it's a bit difficult to take him seriously at this point. But hey! Instant Thunder God, just add water!

Our hero starts smashing things up, hurling them at his foe, and Seidring flicks a finger to surround himself with an impenetrable shield. What to do, what to do? Oh hey! I know!

WOO! GO TEAM THOR!

Thor runs away, but Seidring has absorbed the creepy eye power from Odin, so finding the errant Thunder God isn’t exactly difficult:

THIS is the real reason all the baddies want Odin's power. Creepy Eye Spying = totally awesome!

But it would appear that Thor has something up his tunic, because he’s not just running away to run away. No. He’s heading right for the GIANT ODIN SWORD:

Oh. Oh my. It looks awfully big. Are you sure you want to touch it? Also? Nice reference to the Avengers there, Stan. Thanks for making me feel utterly guilty about not keeping up on that side.

Seidring freaks out, zapping Thor with a carefully aimed bolt of electricity because EVERYONE in Asgard knows that the Odin Sword, if it should fall, will cause the cosmos itself to vanish.  Despite his best efforts, however, Seidring is unable to stop Determined!Thor from reaching his goal:

Don't make him pull the sword, dood. He's got that craaaazy look in his eyes.

Thor delivers an ultimatum: Give the power back to Odin or he’s totally going to drop the sword.  The seconds tick by as Seidring weighs his options, but Thor forces his hand:

Aaaand THOR WINS! Woo! *epic victory dance*

Odin appears, once Seidring returns the power, and he tells Seidring to scram. He does, with haste, and Odin makes sure he knows that he’s going to be dealt with later. But for now? It’s all about Thor. YAY!

Uh...wait. Thor? You can let go of the sword now. Aww...all this fighting just caught up with him. He's been woe-vercome.

Daddy!Odin realizes that he has REALLY messed up this time, and in one of the most touching panels I’ve seen yet, he gathers his unconscious son into his arms and carries him off:

He's totally telling him all of this while he's unconscious so he can deny ever having said it later. Aww. Poor Thor. He's just tuckered out from all that fighting.

In the next issue, we find out what the hell is going on with Pluto and Herc, but in the meantime (from Tales of Asgard):

Thor pauses because seriously, does that look like any serpent YOU'VE ever seen?

 

~Go Team Thor!
Snarkstress *H*


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