Issue #166, The Mighty Thor (July 1969)
The Mighty Thor “A God Berserk!”
Thundering!Thursday, Emo!Thor Enthusiasts!
My what a week it’s been. Where to even start? Tuesday’s as good a place as any.
Poor Dragon was dealing with not one, but TWO work computers conking out on him. So we decided to hit the theater and see Haywire because I have a well known girl-crush on Gina Carano. We got to the theater, made it to the front of the line, was slipping the money under the glass to purchase our tickets, and BOOM!
Power’s out. Theater went dark.
We waited around for a bit, just to see if perhaps it would come back on, but, ALAS! The power was out on the whole damned block. No movie for YOU! We went home.
And then yesterday, leaving out to take Dragon to work, we pass two cop cars, sitting there in the dark on our street and think nothing of it. I do my morning dealie and head home, only to find the one entrance to the road blocked by two cop cars with NOW flashing lights. “No worries,” I say, turning around the car (which has now decided to bling on the check engine light). I circle the block, intent on coming in the OTHER way, only to find that it, too, is blocked off by two cop cars with flashing lights.
Cue panic because a) I can’t get back to my home, and b) I am sans wallet at the time. Faboo.
Adora!Cop wanders over and tells me that I have to go somewhere else because they’re busy doing something at one of the houses. Putting on my best 6am smile, I ask if I can at least go home. He figures out where I’m at and then proceeds to tell me I have to wait because they’re RAIDING THE HOUSE ACROSS THE STREET FROM OURS!
I immediately start wondering if I should just go get some coffee and then remember, oh yeah, no wallet. He tells me to just pull over and they’ll be done in a few minutes. So I wait. Hoping like HELL there isn’t going to be some shootout on the street. After about 15 minutes, he comes back over and we chat a bit about what’s going on (poor guy was apparently as bored as I was) and then he lets me through after I promise to go inside and not come out.
Folks, I have *never* seen a full scale FBI/Police raid before and let me tell you: it’s exciting stuff. If you’re part of the raid. If you’re just a lookie-loo staring out her office window, it’s not nearly as exciting because you have no idea what’s going on… and oh, hey, are those dogs? OMG IS THAT AN URBAN ASSAULT VEHICLE CRAWLING WITH SWAT? OMGOMGOMG! WHERE’S THE POPCORN? AND MY CAMERA?
I had to be awake anyway (despite working all night) because now I’m concerned about the car. The garage doesn’t open until 8am, so I content myself with watching more Castle until 8:05am when I call and am instructed to bring the car in. $100 bucks and 2 hours later, I’m back home and catching a few z’s before racing back out to get Dragon from work.
It’s been an exciting couple of days. Rainy, windy days.
And we still have no clue what the raid was about, but the news hinted this morning about a drug trafficking ring being busted yesterday, so hooray…we were living across the street from meth dealers!
Let’s get on with the show…
When last we left our Emo!Thor, he was freaking out about HIM having abducted Sexay!Sif while his BFF!Balder tried desperately to calm him down.
In full-on SMASH!mode, RAGING!THOR proceeds to knock his BFF away before tearing up the world around him:
HIM has taken his girl, and there’s only ONE thought in our hero’s mind:
He flings his hammer:
Having sufficiently beaten up a few innocent mountains, he calls his BFF to his side:
Thor prattles on about tracking down his prey, fully intent on kicking his ass all over creation, and they disappear. Meanwhile, back in Asgard:
She’s a bit pissy that Hoary!Haag wasn’t successful in snagging her reluctant beloved, but it would appear that Haag isn’t out of the running yet:
Aaaand… somewhere else in the cosmos:
Balder tries to reason with PISSY!THOR, reminding him that HIM can actually read the thoughts of those around him, so… sneaking up on him won’t be an option. And then, the guilt that he’s been dealing with comes roaring to the surface:
Before they can continue, Balder is suddenly snatched up by vines, just as he’s telling Thor how INSANE he’s acting:
Rather than stick around to save his friend, Thor decides he has better things to do:
HIM appears, apologizing to Balder, because he’s totally not the one who flipped out and attacked him before. He was hoping that Thor wouldn’t come after him, despite snagging Sif, and can’t understand just what Thor’s issue is. Thor answers the only way he knows how:
He’s only mildly disappointed at the ineffectiveness of the hammer-fling, but, no matter, he will tear HIM to shreds with his bare-freakin’-hands. HIM, again, tries to figure out where all this wrath is coming from:
Thor freaks right the hell out and charges HIM, intent on ripping him apart, but things don’t go quite as planned because HIM isn’t some helpless whelp:
While the two proceed to beat the crap out of each other, Sif tries to reason with her beloved from her bubble, telling him that HIM wasn’t being malicious in his abduction, just lonely and childlike. Balder tells her that it’s kinda pointless to try to talk to Thor at the ‘mo, because he’s out of his mind. The epic battle continues, with Thor screaming that he will NOT stop the beat-down until HIM is actually dead. HIM responds by flinging boulders at Thor:
Meanwhile, back on Asgard, Daddy!Odin’s royal astrologer stumbles upon the scene and the two watch in growing horror as they realize that RAWR!Thor has lost his mind:
Back at the fight, HIM finally realizes that there is no way he’s going to win, so he cocoons himself in his protective sheath:
Safe from Thor, HIM launches into space, running away from our hero with his tail between his legs:
Once out of orbit, the madness that had clouded our hero’s judgment evaporates:
With HIM gone, Bubble!Sif finally floats back down to the surface, much to Thor’s delight:
Balder appears, having finally hacked himself free of the roots:
Back in Asgard, Daddy!Odin is off to survey his newest toy:
And what is this newest vessel, you may be asking?
While Daddy!Odin is busy glowering about just how Thor has messed up, our hero arrives in Asgard to take responsibility for his actions: