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Guess Who’s Baaaack?

Issue #147, The Mighty Thor (Dec. 1967)

The Mighty Thor “The Wrath of Odin!”

Thundering!Thursday, Emo!Thor Enthusiasts! Again. Winking smile

I won’t bore you with more exposition here…I know you’re just dying to find out what the heck is going on with our hero! (I will note, however, that this wasn’t too bad of a way to make it up to you guys, considering we’ll be starting with 1968 next week!)

ONWARD!

When last we left Emo!Thor, he was being shot at by some guards, while attempting to make off with a giant golden bull statue. Of course, our hero wasn’t acting of his own volition, but you know how cops are: shoot first and ask questions later. Emo!Thor, sorely vexed by this entire debacle, tries to set things right:

Aww, now isn’t that nice of him? He could’ve just let y’all figure out how to get the statue back on the pedestal, but NO! He’s a HERO! YOU’RE WELCOME!

The guards quickly surround him, mouthing platitudes about how that last minute cooperation will make things easier on him, etc. Emo!Thor is a bit surprised:

Wait. Wut? Did you not just see me put the thing back? You DO realize I could snap every single one of your little guns like a twig if I so desired, right? Just so we’re clear.

Surprisingly, Princess!Python speaks up in his defense:

No. Wait. Stop. He’s not…completely innocent, y’know. He’s a god. And gods have *needs*…oh. You mean *that* kind of innocent. Right.

But, see, she isn’t just trying to defend her sweet!baboo:

Because you can’t keep her down, oh no. PYTHON!LEAP!

So the madcap crew ditches Thor, leaving our hero to contend with the police while they go gallivanting off into their magic mystery mobile:

Yeah. Inconspicuous. NO ONE WILL NOTICE *THAT* ON THE ROAD!

The police cart off our hapless Emo!Thor, who is DEEP in his Emo!Funk right now, because woe unto the fallen Thunder God:

*heavy sigh* You wouldn’t understand. I’d have better luck convincing Daddy!Odin that Loki’s served adequate time in his Limbo and deserves a second chance.

After being miranda’d, and waiving his call to an attorney, they get on with the “locking Thor in prison” part, but before they do:

Alas, poor Mjolnir. She doesn’t deserve the ignominy! *gentle rub* Be free, little Mjolnir. Be free.

Speaking of the green one and his prison, Limbo!Loki is having a weird moment:

My Asgardian!Senses are tingling! Something is very…ACK!

He finds himself in Daddy!Odin’s throne room:

WAIT…WHAT? ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? I mean, awesome, dad. I totes understand. Even Loki looks surprised.

Seems like Loki’s free to roam the universe again, but there is ONE caveat:

Oh sure. Sure. Yeah. BECAUSE THAT WARNING HAS WORKED *SO VERY WELL* IN THE PAST.

Balder and Sif, upon seeing Free!Loki are surprised all to hell, and Sexay!Sif refusesto keep her womanly opinion to herself:

Are you out of your MIND, Daddy!Odin? You have *SERIOUSLY* got to be kidding us! Is it time for your yearly NAP??

Daddy!Odin takes offense at Sif questioning his reasoning:

Oh. I see. Well. That clears that up. Great answer there, oh-powerful-Odin. Your argument is “Because I said so”? Really? This is about that Enchanters Three thing, isn't it?

Balder escorts the incredibly (and with good reason) distraught Sif away, while Free!Loki bows and scrapes his way out of the throne room. And within 30 seconds of his departure:

*facepalm*

He magics himself to earth, scaring the hell out of some bums chillaxing in an alleyway:

Being a bum. There is no dignity.

Meanwhile, in a cheerful prison cell:

My life is woe and darkness and the sad. But hey, I look awesome in my not-true-costume. *cue the vi-woe-lins*

His cellmate is just itching for a fight it seems:

*GASP!* Oh no he did NOT!

That seems to snap our hero out of his emo!funk rather fast:

OH SNAP! Someone’s about to get SPANKED! WOO! GO TEAM THOR!

The prison guard waves a gun at Thor, who, immediately contrite, puts the bully back down and finds out that someone has posted his bail! He is free to go!

YAYZ! YOU’RE NOT AT ALL CREEPY OR WEIRD! TOTALLY TRUSTWORTHY! TAKE ME TO YOUR SWEET SWEET RIDE, STRANGER!

Driving through traffic, Wary!Thor starts getting a little…worried:

You promised me candy, damnit. Wait a damned minute…

Not one to be dissuaded, and being overwhelmed by a BAD FEELING:

*gasp!* YOU!…look suprisingly good for spending who knows how long in Limbo. How’ve you been?

The illusionary!car disappears in a poof of light, and Revealed!Loki gives the customary Asgardian greeting:

Nice to see you too, bro! ‘Sup?

Aaaaand…The fight is TOTALLY ON!

EPIC!
FIGHTING!

They pause momentarily for Thor to catch his breath because he is WINDED:

Hold up! Breather. Time out. Okay, good to go! BRING IT!
EPIC!FIGHTING! FOR THE WIN!

The two duke it out through the streets of New York, taking out buildings, signs, and various other landmarks:

Methinks Victorious!Loki is celebrating a bit too early, no?

Exhausted!Thor rallies, swinging as he comes back full bore, but it doesn’t last long:

Shoulda had his V8.

Before RAWR!LOKI can finish him off, Sif and Balder arrive to even the playing field!

WE ARE SO TELLING DADDY!ODIN ABOUT THIS! Just you wait!

Of course, what they don’t realize…

*wince* Well, looks like there’s about to be some serious repercussions from the ever un-reasonable Daddy!Odin. *sigh*

What will happen? We’ll find out next week!

~Go Team Thor!
Snarkstress


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