couchlocked.com couchlocked.com

Emo!Thor Gets Left Behind

tmt184intro

Issue #184, The Mighty Thor (January 1971)

The Mighty Thor “The World Beyond!”

Thunderous!Thursday, Emo!Thor Enthusiasts!

So, I totally didn’t want to do this, but because of … complications… with the last issue of Thor, I’ve had to skip not one, but two issues because coming into a story arc right in the MIDDLE of the story is kinda like your DVR forgetting to tape the first hour of So You Think You Can Dance and realizing you’re going to be stuck watching the second hour and missing all those performances and maybe your favorite performers all went first.  True story.

Essentially, until I can get my hands on a complete #182, you don’t get to see #183 either because that just wouldn’t be nice.

And you KNOW I’m all about the niceness up in Hus Af Snark.

In other news? Currently geeking out over Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning. This game is truly quite fun. It’s not that it’s particularly ground breaking. It’s a typical Fantasy RPG button masher, but seriously: Some of the coolest weapons I’ve seen AND the combat is fun as hell. It’s also pretty, visually speaking, and by all accounts, freaking HUGE. I’ve spent about 30 hours in it thus far, and if I play it for too long a stretch, it gets a bit tedious (as does Skyrim, Dragon’s Dogma, etc.) but it’s great filler between games.

This weekend will be spent with Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood and more Ezio. *fans self*

Also finished the Uncharted trilogy. I need more Drake in my life. I do believe there will be a PS Vita in my future.

Okay, enough prattle. We have THOR!

 

ONWARD!

When last we saw our favorite winged helmet hero, he was getting his face back, escaping from hell, and letting Loki get away (again). Unfortunately, what you DON’T get to see in the interim is a seriously awesome Thor Vs. Dr. Doom storyline, but we’ll just pretend I didn’t just tell you that.

Throbby!Thor has returned home at the behest of Daddy!Odin, stalking purposefully through the streets and noticing that there’s something weird going on:

Everyone seems a little freaked out about something:

No one tells him what’s going on, so he decides that since he’s on his way anyhow, he might as well ask the source:

Truly worried now, Thor pops a squat and promises Daddy!Odin that whatever the problem, he’s totally there to help.:

Apparently, there’s something out there even more powerful that the Allfather, and words just can’t describe it adequately:

This sudden visual demonstration takes our hero a bit by surprise:

When Straightedge!Thor finally relaxes, he finds himself standing in the middle of the cosmos with Daddy!Odin looking at a place in the universe where there’s merely a hand-shaped void:

Thor immediately understands that this is a Very Bad Thing and demands that, clearly, they need to stop just moping and do something about it. They must fight! Of course…there’s a little problem with that. See, Odin already dispatched the Warriors!Three to find out what was going on and they, um, never came back:

HHH!Galactus does, indeed, seem a likely candidate, but Odin’s already thought of that too:

Even Mangog is tied up, so it can’t be him either. Thor goes to suspect #3, but even Loki’s busy being imprisoned, so he’s out:

This is a dilemma for our hero, not because it means the destruction of Asgard, but because it will destroy earth as well:

And as if a giant, hand-shaped hole in the universe weren’t bad enough, something’s screwing with the Odin!Sword:

And what is this word, you may ask? This word that’s freaking out the Allfather?

Thoroughly freaked by Odin’s apparent mental instability, Thor promises to find out who’s responsible for all this weirdness and personally take him down:

From his newly kneeling position, Thor realizes that they aren’t alone:

Apparently, Quiet!Dood has been standing there for a while:

Thor takes exception to this and rushes at the stranger with raised hammer, intent on beating the words out of him, but a swift invisible kick knocks him away before he can get close enough:

This enrages our hero, and Angry!Thor sends his hammer flying, only to watch it pass harmlessly through Quite!Dood’s form before returning to his hand. Odin reiterates that the only one who can possibly hurt the newcomer is himself, but he just doesn’t want to right now. And with that, story time is over:

Surprisingly, Thor is NOT okay with this news:

Daddy!Odin tells him to stay put and disappears into a whirly pink vortex to go save the universe from the world beyond. And as if that weren’t enough:

Daddy!Odin tells him to stay back and the pair disappear in a cloud of purple:

He proceeds to sulk all over the castle, and we turn our attention elsewhere:

He looks up in time to see a comet streak by:

He immediately takes off, zooming through the cosmos to get an army together. Under the impression that he’s learned from his mistakes, he heads for the land of the Storm!Giants:

They all rally to his cause and we head back to Asgard to see how the Littlest!Prince is holding up:

A runner appears to interrupt Thor’s Demi/Swayze moment, letting him know that Loki’s on his way with a big ol’ army of giants and trolls behind him. Oh, but that’s not all:

He immediately hammers off, heading straight for Loki’s camp, demanding to see BFF!Balder:

Thor isn’t about to hear any “terms” from Loki, but before he can bash some sense into Loki’s skull, he’s interrupted by a giant axe trying to bash some sense into his. He barely manages to deflect the blow with Mjolnir, and this has the effect you’d expect:

Immediately, all the giants and trolls dogpile onto Thor in an attempt to keep his hammer from returning to him. But it doesn’t take long before it becomes obvious that plan isn’t going to work and, with Mjolnir once again in hand, our hero bats them all away and finally tracks down his fallen friend:

But lest you think he’s alone in his battle, he finds himself with a sudden ally who ISN’T made of uru and wood:

The baddies see an opportunity and take it:

Which in turn hurtles Thor’s already dismal mood right on over the edge:

He manages to get away, scooping her up and sailing off into the air out of reach:

He sets her down atop a nearby wall, assuring him that her safety was his first concern, and then leaps back into the fray, smacks around a few more baddies, and finally gets the tide turned in his favor:

In the meantime, Loki has slipped away and escaped. A fact that doesn’t sit well with our hero:

Somehow, she gets through to him, and he thanks her for her awesomeness:

But wait!

And what dangerous message does he wish to impart to our stalwart hero?

Of course, being told that he really should stay where he is has the exact opposite effect on Contrary!Thor, inspiring him to ignore what he’s been told and go save Daddy!Odin from whatever the danger is:

And as you all may know:

Until Monday!

snarkstressig


Share Post :

More Posts

Got something to say?