Issue #113, Journey Into Mystery (Feb. 1965)
The Mighty Thor “A World Gone Mad!”
The teaser on the cover kinda says it all and I wanted to have the last Emo!Thor post of 2010 be something really epic. Something really spectacular. Something SO mind blowingly EMO that you couldn’t possibly wait until 2011 to see the next chapter of the saga.
Issue #113 does all of that and more. It brings back an old foe (because, honestly, what better than someone you’ve already fought before?), plucks the heartstrings, and finally answers the question: What would happen if Emo!Thor finally just said “To Hell with it” and spilled the Odin-forbade beans about his true identity?
As I said before…
We open this issue with a huge Viking sky ship, Asgardians spilling out from the top, Daddy!Odin and our favorite Thunder God the helm. We are informed that when Odin calls, none may say him nay, and thus the epic battle against the Demons of Jottenheim begins.
So, as you should’ve guessed, dear reader, the winners of this skirmish are Daddy!Odin and his crew. He decides to take a walk with Battle!Thor, right through the middle of the fight, to tell him how awesomely he performed. And then he drops the bombshell…Boy, I want you to come home. And Emo!Thor, bless his little heart, says Daddy NAY! Of course, Daddy!Odin reacts about as you’d think he would:
Emo!Thor woes away across Bifrost, Daddy!Odin passive/aggressive-ing behind him:
Somewhere along the way, Emo!Thor makes a decision that, call me crazy, I think we’ve heard him bring up before:
Upon landing, we’re told that he really means it this time. And since it’s the end of the year, I’ll let Emo!Thor do the ‘splaining:
Lame!Blake sneaks back into his office, startling Harlot!Jane. He was supposed to be at a medical conference in Chicago and he explains that he came home early. And then things take on a rather…desperate quality:
Yup. He really, really did. The big thing that Daddy!Odin totally forbade him to do. The secret he’s been sworn to silence to uphold. And everyone is in shock:
Everyone remember exactly what all has been found in the bottom of the river? Oui! It is our very own stoned supervillain, Grey Gargoyle. As more and more mud is removed from the statue, what we’ve already deduced becomes rather painfully obvious:
Irate!Gargoyle storms out, intent on picking up right where he left off. First stop? His apartment so he can have a seat and initiate a puffy cloud flashback sequence about his origins. This so angers him that he just HAS to remind us of what his main goal is: namely, find out Thor’s secret of immortality. Easy, right? HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY GO WRONG?
Back in Asgard, it seems Daddy!Odin just got slapped with a dose of “OH NO HE DIDN’T!”, so he’s having a temper tantrum. Unsuspecting!Loki approaches the dinner hall, where the food covered chef flees the scene:
It would appear Loki was unaware until the chicken leg flew by his face that Daddy!Odin was in a bad mood. Not letting that deter him, he walks in on EMO!ODIN woeing all over the hall:
Not one to let an opportunity to gain favor slip through his fingers, Dejected!Loki lays it on ultra-thick, gaining JUST the response he was looking for:
He storms off (haha! See what I did there?) proclaiming that Thor..is no more!
While Victorious!Loki gloats in the corner, back on earth, Lame!Blake is trying to convince Harlot!Jane that he isn’t, in fact, delusional:
While Lame!Blake continues to yammer on about being Thor, we discover that Grey Gargoyle remembers where all the madness initially went down, so he’s naturally returned to the scene of the first confrontation:
Surprise!Gargoyle leaps through the window just then, stopping the mad ramblings of Insane!Blake. Telling Jane to flee, Decisive!Blake throws the book at him:
Gargoyle catches the book, turns IT to stone and hurls it back at Blake. Jane announces the arrival of the elevator (which…really? Bad idea. I’m just sayin’.), and the two duck inside. Grey Gargoyle gives chase, just like a good baddie:
Gargoyle drops to the elevator, turning it to stone as he does so, and we quick scene shift to Asgard where, apparently, someone’s called a meeting of the minds sans Loki and Pissy!Odin:
Balder, of course, is first up to go provide bodyguarding duties, but Loki, intent on keeping everything as chaotic as possible, decides to throw a few obstacles in Balder’s path…just for spite:
Plan B goes into effect, but Loki is prepared for them as well, stopping the outgoing Asgardians with “battle orders” that he completely made up on the spot, dispatching them to the eastern reaches of Asgard until further notice. Naturally, they question his authority, but Loki reminds them that Thor is out of favor with Odin:
But apparently, Loki didn’t know about sneaky Plan C, who successfully sneaks his way to earth while Loki’s distracted. Back on earth, Pursuing!Gargoyle is very publicly chases after the fleeing Blake and Jane, randomly stoning people as he goes:
Blake and Jane duck into an alley for some unknown reason, and Gargoyle gives Lame!Blake one last chance to tell him where to find Thor or he’ll stone them too…and make it permanent:
Suddenly, blue hands twang an arrow into their midst. Bursting into a blinding light, the arrow gives Blake and Jane just enough time to manage to escape the alley and try to get away in a nearby car. At this point, Gargoyle is tired of chasing them down, so he pulls off the gloves, literally:
But, we are reminded yet again, that Lame!Blake is so named for a reason:
But again that blue hand of blueness appears and this time, a voice tells the fallen Blake that he has 30 seconds to be Thor. Lame!Blake IMMEDIATELY forgets his vow to never again take up the mantle of Thor (AGAIN) and Thwack-Thor’s out, using Mjolnir to make his point:
Of course, somehow Gargoyle survives the hit, rubbing it in:
Commence fighting: The bell rings (metaphorically) and it’s ON. Thor finally answers Gargoyle’s question about his secret to immortality…uh, he was BORN a god, dood, duh? While Gargoyle continues yammering on about how he MUST preserve his awesomeness, Thor decides to make the most of what little time he has left by ripping up some city-owned lamppost, and conducting that electrical energy into a lightning bolt that fries the crap out of Gargoyle:
Our hero wanders off, in search of his helping blue hand, but along the way he starts feeling a little lightheaded and weak:
When he finally passes out, we get a glimpse of a cloud poofing up to Asgard, reforming into a warrior headed back to Odin’s Hall. Seems Honir The Hunter was sent there on a mission specifically set forth by Odin himself:
Lurking!Loki is irritated about this new turn of events, but he vows to continue thwarting Thor until he’s truly the victor. But back on earth, our lame, unglamorous doctor has a bit of a decision to make:
Decision made, torturous though it must have been, he heads back to where Jane is still unconscious, cradling her close and telling her that he’s SANE now:
Blake shows off his handiwork and they call the police to take care of Lump!Gargoyle. As we leave this tale, Jane and Blake share a tender moment:
Stay tuned: In the next issue, the Mighty Thor finds himself going toe-to-toe with a brand new foe that is guaranteed to challenge him in ways he’s NEVER dreamed of!
Have yourself a safe New Year’s Eve! See you in 2011!
~Go Team Thor!
The Snarkstress *H*